Anyone who truly knows me, knows that I speak my truth come hell or high water.
I do not like being in situations where I feel that my authenticity is being compromised by having to "keep my mouth shut". This is THE most painful thing a person could do to me. . . my own personal form of torture. When I see dishonesty and manipulation going on at a level that most people would not even recognize, it INFURIATES me to have to sit by and watch. I have tried to "trust the process" and let karma work itself out, and I KNOW that it will, HOWEVER, I can no longer remain silent if and when Spirit tells me to speak. THIS (in my opinion) is what the Bible was referring to in Mark 3:29 in regards to blaspheming the Holy Spirit and it being an unforgivable sin. Going against our inner voice is deeply painful and has many ill side effects. Also, by continuing to ignore that inner voice, over time it fades to a level of seemingly non-existence, thus we end up in our own personal hell, unable to forgive ourselves. I refuse to live in that space.
Everyone always says "Honesty is the best policy." but nobody really seems to want REAL HONESTY. It's hard. I get it. It can be very uncomfortable and cause us to look at the darkest parts of ourselves and others. But when we shy away from confrontation out of fear, we dishonor the Spirit within us and feed the shadow, which only gives it more power, both in our individual lives and collective culture. So how do we integrate our shadow selves, (the "darker" side, the "alter-ego", the "inner-bitch") into real life situations without allowing it to take control, creating more chaos and ultimately being counter-productive?
Well, we start by not suppressing our voice of truth to begin with. It's allowing it to sit there, just under the skin... simmering... to the point it boils over and we can no longer control its behavior that gives our shadow such a bad rep!
How would our lives be different if we honored our inner voice by speaking our truth without any attachments to others reactions? Now, please don't confuse this with me advocating walking around being a complete asshole, talking down to others and then dressing it in a blanket called "authenticity" and "listening to Spirit". Spirit isn't an asshole, but it IS honest and sometimes we don't like what we hear. Spirit guides us in truth on behalf of the highest good for all involved, even if it doesn't seem so at first. Often times our speaking the truth is a catalyst that leads to other puzzle pieces falling together and ultimately, creates a beautiful manifestation for all that is. Remember Romans 8:28, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Now, many of you know that I am not a literal Bible believing fundamentalist Christian, but I know truth when I feel it. I will address the "gender" of my Higher Power in another post, but for now, my point is that I DO trust the process, knowing that every situation is playing out for the highest good of all, BUT I also have to honor my own personal role in this process by honoring the Spirit of Truth within ME! Remaining silent and reserved on the sidelines, hoping and waiting for it all to pass, is not living an authentic life, is NOT honoring Spirit and in fact, may very well hinder the process all together by creating more chaos and pain for all involved.
So, today I am going to start doing my very best to honor Spirit as well as allow my shadow the space for its voice to be heard BEFORE it turns into the raging bitch who can't control her temper!!
